Where'd They Go?

"Where'd all the good guys go?"

I can't even count how many times I've heard this statement recently. I've heard it said from people I just met to old friends. It seems to be a common statement among my friends who are dating or single. The issue isn't always the frustration with our current dating situation, but seeing it contrasted against snapshots of friends in a different situation, on the same timeline. It's a filter of what we want, but have not yet discovered or found.

I grew up in church, and remember those "Wait for the right one" type talks. This is my issue with the word "waiting" in terms of dating. It sounds passive. I totally get why it's used, but it sounds like you're putting your life on hold to find someone. It puts you in the back seat, rather than the front seat. It sounds like you're living your life "reactively."

Instead of questioning where did all the good guys go or "waiting" around. Go out there and live. Live and live life well. 

If there is something you've been dying to pick up or somewhere you've always wanted to go, save your money, find a friend, and go! Instead of sitting back and "waiting," better yourself into the person you want to be. Instead of focusing on the characteristics you are looking for in someone else, sharpen them in you. Sharpen and define those characteristics in yourself. 

Lastly, just don't settle. Know your value, know you are worthy, and don't discount it, don't cheapen yourself to not being treated well. 

"A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect."

So, what if we changed the conversation, single folks, instead of where are they or "he's just not ......"? Into, where am I, and who do I want to be? 


1 comment :

  1. Thanks for sharing your heart. I totally agree! I'm so glad I lived my life and didn't just "wait" for someone before doing so. Love the Matt Chandler quote about how there are lots of neat Christian boys, but Godly men are rare...so true! Keep on writing girl! :)